Teens Think About: Keeping Secrets

by A.S.Santos


Although on the surface the SPRG Trilogy is about Samantha Davidson’s experience of discovering her psychic abilities, underneath it all is actually every teenage girl’s experience of discovering life and love… and realizing that things can get complicated.

One of these “complicated” issues involves "Keeping Secrets" (mentioned in Book 1: Voices In The Theater, particularly in Chapters 7 and 17), so let’s talk a bit more about that here.

The Reason We Keep Secrets

While we have many reasons for keeping secrets--and we human beings have a wide array of secrets we often want to keep--the one common thing that makes us keep these secrets is fear.

Some experts say that people’s greatest fear is not death, or suffering, or even public speaking.

Instead, people's greatest fears are "humiliation" and "being judged by other people."

And if we're really honest with ourselves, one of those two things is always at the heart of why we keep something a secret.

Maybe the secret we're not telling is something we're not really ashamed of.

But most likely it's something that we're not sure how other people will react to; most likely, our guess is that they're not going to react in a way that will make us feel better.

In the book "Voices In The Theater," Sam not only keeps her abilities a secret; she also keeps certain things about her past to herself: her fears, her pains, her regrets.

In the story, sharing these secrets with someone she trusted turned out to be very helpful for her, because it got her to thinking about how to be more active in directing her future, instead of just dwelling on her past.

She also realized the huge toll that keeping secrets had on her, psychologically and emotionally. She hadn't been able to discover much about who she really was, because she was too busy burying parts of herself that in the end needed to be revealed in order to heal.

 
You can tell when a secret you are keeping is something you already need to tell someone about: they eat you up inside, and keep you from enjoying more authenticity as a person and more honesty in your relationships. They keep your world small, and keep your fears big.

If and when you do decide to share your secrets, make sure it's with someone trustworthy; someone that other people like yourself trust, too.

Meanwhile, here are some resources online that you can benefit from as you're deciding about what to do with the secrets in your life (just click on the highlighted "titles" -- these links will open up a new tab when you click on them):

• Excerpt from "Voices In The Theater" by A.S.Santos

  This short read-aloud excerpt from the novel "Voices In The Theater" describes first hand how keeping secrets can tear you up inside. Maybe you can relate?
  
  

• I've Got A Secret

  This article tells you about using the picture book "DoYou Have A Secret?" by Jennifer Moore-Mallinos to distinguish between "good secrets" and "bad secrets" -- to discuss with kids and maybe even teens. Useful for teachers, counselors, and parents.
  
  

• Why Is My Teen Keeping Secrets From Me?

  If you're a parent with teenagers, this article helps you decide which secrets you should be concerned about, and which ones to let go of (so as not to bug your teen unnecessarily).
  
  

• The Secrets Teens Keep and Ways To Get Them Talking

  Another article for parents and grown ups, this one includes specific questions and scripts that help you better communicate with teenagers, and explains the real reasons teens sometimes need to keep secrets.
  
  

• If You Have A Secret Regret You Want To Share

  ...but you want to do it anonymously, you can post it on the "Secret Regrets" blog. The act of sharing your secret might help you get some of the load off your chest, make you realize you're not alone, and maybe even help you take that first step towards finding someone to help you with healing.
  
  

• BUT If You Are Having Suicidal Thoughts

  ...this is not a secret you should be alone with.
  
  Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline now at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) anytime, any day.
  
  You can also visit their website at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
  
  
  If you're in Manila, Philippines, you can also call:
  
  "In Touch" Crisis Lines: (632)211-1305 or (632)893-7606
  
  or
  
  LOJ Counseling Center: (632)7264709
  
  Both are available for you any day, 24/7.

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Copyright (c) 2014 by A.S.Santos. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.

Get "Voices In The Theater" here:
http://flipreads.com/Voices-In-The-Theater